The following is an excerpt from a short story that is in the stages of a final draft. This piece is currently being marketed in the draft this excerpt was pulled from. At this point in the story, Ronnie and his wife Susan are sitting down for breakfast.

She sat his plate before him and took a seat, pulling a napkin out of the bin in the middle of the table as she did so. Ronnie reached for her hand, and she quickly moved it to her lap. He sat there for a moment, looking, longing.

“Are you going to eat or just-”

“Susan, I can’t do this anymore.” The floodgates had opened now, tiny rivers burst from unknown seams and inched toward his chin. She started a response, but he stopped her.

“I can’t keep getting up everyday and pretending this is ok. It’s not ok. I’m not ok.” He took another shallow breath, feeling ridiculous for this sudden outpour. She continued to stare, but the expression changed ever so slightly. Something else hid in the background, but he could just barely see it. The knot in his throat was bigger now, making it hard to speak.

“I- I’m sorry for what I did, for hurting you so much, for screwing up everything.”

She started to speak, crinkled her nose slightly, and then covered her face with her hand. She seemed to freeze for a moment, and then took a series of quick breaths. Her own tears peeked out from under her hands a moment later. Ronnie’s heart bent inside his chest, wringing out the buildup.

“It was a mistake. I know it was and I swear to you I will never make that same one-” He was reaching now, reaching for anything he could grasp.

She dropped her hands immediately, her face flushed with red.

“There are some mistakes you can’t make up for!” Her eyes were swimming in tears, but Ronnie could see the pain behind them. Pain he inflicted and could probably never completely take away. At least now he knew she was still in there, and that he’d finally gotten in touch with the woman he loved. She took a slow breath and shook slightly as she exhaled.

“I lay down in that bed and all I can think of is her!” Her words creaked as they came out, like tiptoes on a cold floor.

“I think of you. I think of holding you and-”

“And what? And how good it was?” She crinkled the napkin and wiped at her eyes absently. Ronnie felt like his chest may lock at any moment from the growing pressure. He tried to answer, but couldn’t.

“You let all this time go by and you wait till now to say something to me? Did you think I would just forget? Did you think it was like missing an anniversary or buying me a vacuum for Christmas?” Her words were short and sharp, teetering on the line between anger and rage.

“No, of course not. I just didn’t expect it to go this far. I didn’t expect to lose my job or-”

“I guess you should’ve thought about that before you spent your business trip bending your secretary over.” Her eyes cut him almost as deep as the words. Ronnie wanted to correct her, but he knew better. His face felt hot and tight. He ran a hand to the bridge of his nose and tried to clear the tears. Susan took a quick breath and clasped her hands above her eyes, as if she were shading her vision from the overhead light. Ronnie noticed for the first time that her ring was missing.

“I hope losing your job isn’t the only thing that concerns you right now. I hope losing your wife-” Her voice trailed to a stop as her chest heaved once more. Ronnie wanted badly to reach for her, to hold her like he did before. Her threat was unreasonable; he tried to ignore it.

“Don’t talk like that. We’re better than that. We can get through this.”

“Don’t tell me we can get through this!” The shade collapsed and her red eyes burned through him again.

“Don’t you say a word. You didn’t drive all the way up there for some fabulous conference to find your husband in bed with some whore!”

“She’s nothing to me Susan. She’s a bad memory and a mistake. You’re everything to me. You know that.” His voice rose with the reply, he tried to control it.

“I knew that.” Her lip twitched, a tear rolled down her cheek. She pushed away from the table and made way for the bedroom, letting out quiet sobs as she went.